By the time drill rolled around on the first weekend of February, Jason and I had be emailing a lot. I was starting to open up to him about everything from my unhappiness with Jerk Boy, and my antsiness to graduate and move on. He was starting to open up to. I was drifting away from some of my friends that I had been friends with for years and years. I just no longer had the desire to follow those same footsteps anymore. I thought it was all a little juvenileand boring. It was so easy to talk to someone and get it all out when you didn’t have to look at him. And to have him understand what I was talking about. It was all to wonderful to have a confidant. As I drove to drill in February I went to Jerk Boys house first. It turned into a replica of past visits. Me having to hunt him down, and then spending enough time with him for HIM to be satisfied and them me leaving. If I didn’t want to be a part of the satisfaction activities, things would get a little rough. It was very degrading, so why did I keep going back? I still have to ask myself that. I have no idea.
After the first night of drill, which turned out to only be an hour, Jason asked if I wanted to go to the mall with him. He said La Femme Nikita had other plans, and me staying in my barracks all night would be to boring. He was right. My little room in that big creaky building, that is meant to hold 40-50 people, but was currently housing 2-3 was boring… and scary! So he waited down in his car as I went to change, and off to a night on the town! Well not really. We stopped by his place so he could change. I felt so awkward in his apartment. It was a teeny tiny college apartment. But it was his. My heart was beating so hard, I’m sure he could hear it back in his room while I was still on the couch in the living room. I couldn’t believe I was in his house. I was drinking in everything, trying to memorize it all. From the pictures on the wall to the smell. It smelled like him. So good. And the computer in the corner, the one he used during the month to talk with me. I don’t know why that struck me, but I knew at that point, there was no denying it, no going back. I was sure I more than liked this person.
We went to Burger King for dinner that night. I got a kids meal and Jason laughed at me. But I couldn’t justify eating to much or paying more for the same thing. The toy was a Mr Potato spin top. I was sure we would be asked to leave after we started to play with it on the table of the restaurant. We were being so loud and crazy. But we were finally having fun. It was so nice. After we tired of the Mr. Potato we headed of to the mall. We walked through and through and through. We must have walked down the same halls 4 or 5 times. Talking and talking. After we got bored of that Jason decided he would take me for a drive. Of course I didn’t turn him down. He showed me some of the touristy spots. It was difficult because it had gotten dark while we were at the mall. So after a while he drove me back to my barracks. I remember as I climbed into to bed that night that it was going to be hard to fall asleep. I was right.
When I hear the word vacation, I think lazy times ahead. I eagerly look forward to it. When I was younger we never went on vacation. My dad was a farmer, and cows and crops simply don’t take breaks. Then as I got older and we moved off the farm, the factory my dad worked at didn’t take breaks either. If it did, he would work the maintenance crew for the opportunity to continue feeding his family. I always had this visual, this idea on what a vacation was all about. It was all in my imagination, seeing as I had nothing to compare it to. After Jason and I were married, we had to wait until the following spring break -9 whole months- before we were able to go on our honeymoon. We went to the Oregon coast, my first time to ever see the ocean. It was wonderful. We had so much fun. I look back on that time alone with such fondness. The carefree vibe it had, the time to connect with each other that normal everday life chokes out. No plans except the spur of the moment idea. I loved every minute of those 3 days.
We are getting ready to leave for our 2008 vacation. I’m jealous of our honeymoon right now. 10 years (minus 9 months, of course!) we loaded up our car one afternoon and took off. We planned it the day before. There were no lists, no budgeting, no shopping for weeks before hand to get everything we needed, no Rubbermaid’s for storage. No anything. Just two backpacks, and two sleeping bags. And two young smiling faces dying to get away together. We don’t leave for another week, and we already have 4 or 5 different lists. I’ve been budgeting in our needs into the grocery bill for the last couple of weeks to get everything we need without having to file bankruptcy. I keep having to point out the highlighted day on the calendar to 2 little boys… one of which knows perfectly well how to read a calendar. I normally have a pretty high stress level. It takes a lot to really start wearing me down. This planning is really starting to wear me down! But I got to thinking. I don’t think it’s the planning. I think it’s the wanting to leave. I catch myself looking at the calendar along side the boys. The itch to sratch it and just leave now. Throw the stupid lists in the trash recycle, hop in the car and go. Lists are for the birds anyways. I know that all we really need are 4 backpacks, 4 sleeping bags and 4 smiling faces dying to get away together to have a really great time.
So yesterday was father’s day. I always wonder if we are weird in this house as father’s day, as well as mother’s day, isn’t really a huge deal in our house. We honor our parents on that day, but I expect nothing from Jason, and he expects nothing from me. As the mother to his children, and not to him, I help the boys pick out a gift, pay and wrap it for them. Jason is not my father, but the father to my GORGEOUS boys. I help them prepare, but all the glory is theirs to give. I would hate to take away from them being able to honor their daddy, like I always got to honor mine.
And speaking of mine, my dad is awesome. I would go as far to say my dad is the best. I’m sorry to tell you that. He is better than yours. My dad is a very quiet person, but his presence is always known. If you love to laugh,then listen up, because he always has a joke. You would hate to miss something he says. He took every little silly gift we gave him and oohed and awed over it… even if it did end up in the garbage a few days later. We knew he loved it. He still has a key chain that I bought him 15 years ago, tucked away in his top drawer. It is still in the original box that it came in. I saved up my paper route money to buy him something nice. Something he would never get himself. I saw it at the mall in the window ofa jewelry store. It was a sterling silver tag with the dimond cut word’s ‘#1 Dad’ written on it. He put it in the top drawer that night, where it has stayed ever since. At first I was a little hurt, and when I asked him about it he told me that it was very special and that everyday use would wear it down and make it ugly, and the fact that he might lose it at work was enough to pacify me. He loved it so much he wanted to keep it safe. Now at 29 years later, I can giggle and realize that while I still think it’s pretty, that is exactly the point. It’s pretty. My dad doesn’t really make a habit of carting around ‘pretty’ things! He could have quietly given it to goodwill or someone else, but he hasn’t. He has kept it. For 15 years. I’ve had a lot of people tell me recently that it must suck to have a birthday that is overshadowed by Father’s Day, but I disagree. I love that I get to share that special day and that special bond with my dad. It really is difficult to put into words how much I love my birthday a little more every seventh year. And it’s all because I get to share it with Daddy.
I’m so glad summer is finally here. I get to sleep in…. about 1/2 hour longer than I did before. I don’t have to get dressed immediately, unless I slummed it up and took Fred to school in my pj’s, which I did on more than one occasion…. don’t judge, you’ve done it to, I know you have. I love the freedom of no schedule, but MY schedule. That’s about where the gladness ends. We have spent more days than I’d like to admit gazing out the window at pouring rain, or attempting a scooter ride in mach 5 winds. It is raining as I type this. Oh and our other favorite activity, staring at our car that we can’t afford to fill up and dreamingof all the places she used to take us whenever we have the itch to drive off and remind ourselves of the schedule we left behind in the school yard. So instead, my kids are getting their 20 minutes of reading in for the Summer Reading Program at the Library, they are getting very good at Uno, and they are mastering the art of whining. They are going to win gold in the Olympics, just as soon as they add whining to their list of sports. (I hope it gets added to the summer Olympics because 1. kids whine better in the summer, and 2. the summer Olympics are better.) So I guess to sum it up, we are getting really tired of doing our winter activities during summer break!!!! Come on nicer weather, come to Idaho….. but not scalding weather, you can stay were you are.
**Edited to add** It was nice enough on the day we went to the local arcade/go-cart track to celebrate the 10 year anniversary of Jason and I standing in front of a judge, promising to love and honor and cherish each other for all of time. So far we’ve held good on that promise.
This weekend a group of us girls went up to the mountains to ‘camp’. And by camp I mean stay in a cabin with heat and plumbing. It was difficult to rough it so much.
This is about as much nature as we saw, and this picture was taken through a window….
But as rough as it was it was so fun. I am always amused that a group of ladies can go from topic A to topic Z, and have wrapped back around to topic F in approximately 10 minutes. I am amazed that God made women so much differently then men. I love my family more than I probably should, but I do enjoy the occasional get a way. That God made us to need that contact with other women and the need to just sit and chat and laugh with them for a day or two and to be completely refreshed is wonderful. I know that if Jason was in that situation he would come home needing to dig a hole and live there for a week or two!
I was a little worried to leave, as Jason was sick when I left. I had no way to call him to check in with him, but he woke up Saturday morning feeling a lot better. We are both pretty sure he had a mild ear infection that cleared upon it’s own. Which is good considering he was pretty sick. He and the boys ended up having a wonderful weekend. Four of us girls got up to the cabin earlier Friday afternoon and we sat out in the sun by the river and just chatted until a few others showed up and we went out to dinner. The rest of the girls showed up and the rest of the night was just spend sitting around the large living room laughing and talking… in that order! Well I would say that’s how the rest of the weekend went, except for the little walk we thought we would take Saturday afternoon. It was a beautiful spring day up in the mountains of Idaho. The air was cool, and refreshing. We were going to walk to where the creek came down the mountain. Halfway there it started sprinkling. We decided that since we had already come so far it would be silly to turn around, because as soon as we did it would just stop. So we pushed on. I mean it was just a little stroll, not a marathon! Well it was not a quick little mountain sprinkle. It was a great big mountain thunderstorm, with big fat rain drops that turned into hard hurt-y hails!!! Yeah we decided to turn around. But not before we were completely soaked and cold. But luckily it wasn’t freezing. Just slightly uncomfortable cold. But as we rounded a bend and angle of God was coming up the road in Barbies Tahoe! Not the doll Barbie, the cool Barbie who drives a Tahoe big enough to fit us all in! We were stuffed and shoved in, but it was dry and warm and moving faster than we could!!! And just as we thought, it stopped raining as soon as we got home.
If that shirt was one shade lighter it would have been scary up in them mountains!!!
So after we were all dried off and changed, it was a little more of the same, good snacks and good talking. You know with the ladies knowing about topics A-Z, there is never a lacking for some yacking. Some haircuts and coloring happened, some Wii happened, some marshmallow roastin’ happened, and also some talking about Jesus happened. Sunday morning came along and it was time to clean up and pack up. I had a great time reconnecting to some great ladies and getting to know a new friend. I love my time with my friends, but I will still say my absolute favorite thing about a Ladies Weekend, is walking in my front door to 3 sets of arms welcoming me back home. How I love that.